All change

The first proper week of working January has been one of change. Changes in my radio work, changes in my toddler’s childcare and changes in my evening schedule. It’s necessary change that needed to happen.

At the end of last year life was pretty tricky. We suffered a family loss, my working hours had snowballed to around 75 a week (plus the 1.5 – 2 hour commute every day) and the house looked like it had been trashed by a million angry children intent on creating ten thousand loads of washing that hadn’t been touched.

Over Christmas I decided enough was enough. I can take life on five or six hours sleep – but not every single night. I can take working evenings when I have to be up at 4am for my radio job – but not every single night. I can take the mother guilt that comes with feeling too tired to properly focus on playing with my toddler – but not every single day. Sometimes I need a break.

In a quest to try and regain a tiny scrap of the balance I lost at the end of last year, I’ve made a few changes. These little changes will likely pave the way towards some bigger ones as the year goes on, but for now we are all happy and healthy and actually having fun.

Slightly shorter working hours have meant I’ve managed to get some of my evening work done in the day, meaning I’ve had some time off at night to pursue the rock and roll antics of watching TV while knitting AT THE SAME TIME. I know, I live life on the edge. The lack of balance I wrote about just over a week ago is starting to tilt more in my favour.

Frog has started a new nursery. She now goes to nursery a couple of mornings a week and to her beloved childminder the remaining three mornings. She loves it. Although returning home tired and muddy from treks in the woods and time seeing the nursery animals (including three donkeys – that kid is LUCKY), she’s not cried once and actually had a huge tantrum on the first day I arrived to collect her. “I NOT GO HOME MUMMY! I SLEEP AT NURSERY!” So nice to feel loved.

Muddy toddler gear

Muddy toddler outdoor gear – standard after a morning at nursery.

A couple of evenings without being chained to my computer have given me a fresh perspective during the day and I’ve been far less tired. Last week Frog had a hospital appointment about her hypermobile joints and we had time to kill before the session.

We popped to a park nearby and I was reminded of this time last year when my toddler couldn’t even walk around the same park. This time she was running and jumping and climbing. I was awake and happy enough to relish the experience and not go all teary at the memory.

That’s progress.

Park funClimbing tot

I like this change. This change is good.

Comments

  1. Ruth says

    Lovely, lovely, lovely. Reading this post has put such a smile on my face – no small achievement for a Monday morning! I’m so pleased that F is happy in her new nursery and that you’re managing to carve out some tiny slivers of time for yourself – knitting is TOTALLY rock and roll by the way. Hope the balance continues to improve as your year goes on xxx

  2. says

    Change is good. It sounds a bit less of a ruthless schedule too which is always good. I’ve got to sign z up for nursery soon and I need to push myself to do it. It never seems to stay still for long does it?

  3. says

    Ahh that’s good news. I don’t know how you managed before! Although I guess the more you do, the more you are able to do. I work from home, not much, but I even struggle to do anything in the evenings as I’m so tired! X

    • says

      I worked from home in 2011 and it was TOUGH! Cramming 30 hours into 20 hours is never easy. That’s the life of a working parent though I guess!

  4. says

    How wonderful. Well done for recognising the signs of a life that needs more balance and then having the guts to do something about it. I reckon that’s the hardest part. Such a shame for your children to grow up and then realise you missed all of these special times. Enjoy :)

  5. says

    Sounds fab and amazing how small changes can make a big difference. Well done to your beautiful girl too-amazing seeing her progress. I’m so sorry for your loss at the end of last year. Here’s wishing you all a great year in 2013 x

  6. says

    Doing those hours doesn’t make anyone happy does it? Glad you’ve found some control. Can be tough getting a work life balance sometimes though, we’ve just taken the decision to move nearer to my work so my commute will be 10 mins and not 60 mins from March. Going to be a huge difference.
    Oh and love the photos, such a cute cheeky girl :)

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