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You are here: Home / SELF LOVE & BODY IMAGE / How to survive bad body image during lockdown

How to survive bad body image during lockdown

March 24, 2020 by Molly Leave a Comment

It took just two days for the memes to start. The fat jokes nestled innocently amongst pictures of people stockpiling loo roll and singing on balconies, providing all the LOLz to a world quickly succumbing to COVID-19. For many, it seems the one thing worse than getting the virus is getting fat during quarantine.

And in between the memes and the blatant fatphobia there are a million home workouts encouraging us not to use the world crisis as an excuse to “get lazy” (i.e. put on weight) and a million other influencers offering up “immunity boosting” recipes that promise to not only protect you from catching the virus but keep your abs on point too. Diet culture disguised as wellness is nothing new, but you’d think it would give us a break while the world is on its knees.

DIET CULTURE DURING COVID-19

So if you’re struggling to feel good about your body in this current climate it’s not your fault – in fact, it’s probably kind of inevitable. And if you’re then feeling bad about feeling bad about your body when there are so many other things to feel bad about right now… well, that’s not your fault either.

It doesn’t mean you’re vain or shallow or you haven’t got better things to worry about. It just means you’re not immune to all the messages profiting from your insecurities, and you’re not immune to the physical effects of anxiety which so often show up as an “I feel fat” moment.

So much is out of our control right now, so it’s natural that you may be trying to gain some of that control back by “taking charge” of your body. Diets, intensive work-outs, regimented food schedules… these are all ways anxiety can manifest into poor body image, with diet culture conveniently appearing at just the time you’re looking for some coping strategies.

FAT IS NOT A FEELING

When you’re spiralling into this moment it might help to remember that fat is not a feeling. Identifying the emotion you’re *actually* experiencing is a great way to ground yourself in your body and gain some perspective. The Feelings Wheel designed by Dr Gloria Wilcox can help you do this…

Surviving bad body during a pandemic might seem like the least of your problems, but as we already know body image can have a huge impact on many other areas of our life – from our mental health to our physical health, to the way we engage and interact with the people around us. And this last bit – the people around us – is the bit I’m most concerned with right now.

CANCELLING DIET CULTURE AROUND KIDS

Because for the past nine months I’ve been campaigning for a change in rules around the way diet clubs and weight loss services are advertised around children, arguing that what our kids see on their way into school every day has a huge impact on how they feel about their own bodies. (Read this piece I wrote for The Unedit for more on that.)

But now so many children aren’t actually going to school the stakes at home are arguably so much higher. I don’t mean to ramp up the pressure (we’ve got enough of that already what with keeping our kids safe and well along with the home schooling and inevitable arguments over screen time and maths homework) BUT it is something to consider. Next time you have an “I feel fat” moment ask yourself what it is you’re *actually* feeling, why you’re feeling this way, and what the impact of diet culture on your kids might be if you allow it to infiltrate your home.

If you’re keen to avoid some of these diet culture traps and promote a body happy environment at home I’ve uploaded some new resources to the #FreeFromDiets website. The printable Body Happy Kids planner is packed with inspiration for confidence-boosting things you can do with your children at home during this period – and you might even get something from it too. I’ve also started a new weekly Body Happy Kids email zine you can subscribe to for more ideas and resources which might help over the next few weeks.

WHAT WE SEE AND LISTEN TO MATTERS

Now, more than ever before, use your click currency and your internet power to raise UP the accounts that make you feel good and switch OFF the accounts that make you feel bad. Mute the stuff that triggers bad body feelings and diversify your feed.

We’re not out on the street seeing a range of gorgeous different bodies every day so make sure you’re seeing some of that every day reality in your social media feed too. And not just perfectly lit, glamorously photographed bodies either – but a whole range of different people doing a whole range of different things. And not just people – but cats and dogs and all of the other cute stuff the internet has to offer! This will have a direct impact on the way you feel about your body.

While you’re there, seek out some positive, inspiring, brilliant podcasts to follow too (*cough* I hear Body Cons is very good).

THE THREE THINGS ACTIVITY

You’ve downloaded the resources, felt the feelings, listened to the podcast, cleared out your social media accounts… but still feel bad. What next? This activity might help (it’s also something you can do with your kids if you’re looking for some creative homeschooling activities!)…

  1. Write down the names of three people you love.
  2. Write down three things you love about those three people.
  3. Read your list and note how many of those things are appearance-related….

Then, if you’re feeling up to it, write down three things those very same people might put next to your name. If you love and value the people around you for who they are, this might help to hammer home that the things they love and value about you are the things that make you, you – not the shape of your body.

HAVE A KITCHEN DISCO

Genuinely not even joking. There is a huge amount of evidence into the benefits of joyful movement, including bringing a feeling of gratitude and connection to your body, easing anxiety, tension and getting out of your head. And what’s more joyous than a kitchen disco (handy because real discos are out of the question at the moment)? I’ll be doing a kitchen disco live over on Instagram on Friday at 3pm GMT, but even if you can’t join me then just putting some music on, having a boogie around the kitchen and loosening up is a great way to come back to your body in a positive way.

I’ll be sharing lots of resources, ideas and inspiration over the next few weeks for ways to feel good in your mind and body during this unsettled period, and ways you can help your kids feel good too. In the meantime, check out the resources page of the #FreeFromDiets website, listen to Body Cons, and follow me on Instagram for almost-daily nuggets of body love.

FURTHER RESOURCES:

Be Real campaign

Dove Self Esteem project

Beat Eating Disorder charity

Center for Change

Filed Under: SELF LOVE & BODY IMAGE Tagged With: body image, coronavirus, coronavirus and diet culture, COVID-19, diet culture

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Hello and welcome! I'm Molly Forbes - podcaster, presenter and blogger with a passion for positivity, confidence and body image chat. Regularly writing and vlogging about empowering female issues from a motherhood angle, I also cover lifestyle and fashion topics for like-minded mums who want to rediscover themselves after having children. Thanks for stopping by! Read More…

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This was taken at the start of half term, when the This was taken at the start of half term, when the kids were still enthusiastic about going for a walk. 1,705 walks around the same bit of countryside later... not so much 😬 
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If you’re struggling to get your kids motivated to move their body at the moment, go gentle. You’re not alone. Bad weather coupled with boredom coupled with the lure of screens is a heady recipe for lethargy - and that’s just me! 
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Seriously though, remember: all movement is valid. Even if it’s just a ten minute @cosmickids sesh or a little kitchen disco, it all counts. And if it comes from a place of enjoyment and fun, kids (and adults!) are going to be far more likely to want to get involved.
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What joyful movement activities are your kids enjoying right now (if any?!)?
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[Image description: Molly and her two daughters are standing in a field. They’re wearing colourful wellies, holding hands and smiling.]
I founded a social enterprise 😵 . Introducing: I founded a social enterprise 😵
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Introducing: @bodyhappyorg 🎉
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We are a Community Interest Company dedicated to promoting positive body image in children. We help adults help the kids in their care be friends with their bodies 🥰. 
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Through workshops and classes, digital and physical resources (both free and paid) we help parents, carers, teachers, youth leaders - and any adults who are ever around children - create body happy settings for kids to thrive in. 
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We launch officially next month with a beautiful new website and lots of resources which we’ll continually be adding to. In the meantime give us a follow at @bodyhappyorg - we start posting from today and our page has been designed as a free resource on its own! 
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I’m privileged to work alongside an incredible team of people on this. Shout-out to the original dream team @chelseacoxstrategist @amysnellingpt @effinitupfaye @lottie_storey @bodyconfidencecards_db @rachel_hobnobs & @aceandping 💕 LOVE YOU ALL! 💕
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[Image description: A blue square with yellow and white text which reads “the body happy org”. This is the logo for The Body Happy Organisation CIC]
Proof that I did wear clothes other than a tea-sta Proof that I did wear clothes other than a tea-stained hoodie and tracksuit bottoms at least once in the past month 😐
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[Image description: Molly is wearing pink dungarees with yellow buttons over a black rollneck long-sleeved top. She has a monochrome striped hairband on and her hair is pink. She is also wearing earrings with boobs on them. She looks very pleased, both with her earrings, the pink hair and the fact she’s not wearing sleepwear, for a change.]
A new report from the Education Policy Institute h A new report from the Education Policy Institute has concluded an obvious gender divide in the well-being of young adults. If you’d like to read more check out this article by Eleanor Peake in @newstatesman (I’ve linked to it in my Stories).
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Every week I get messages from parents and teachers concerned about the impact of social media on their kids’ body image. And of course, I couldn’t write a book about body image in kids and teens without covering social media - there’s a whole chapter in Body Happy Kids dedicated to the subject. 
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The thing is, social media isn’t going anywhere. And just like it can be a force for anxiety, shame and general angst it can be a force for good too. The trick is in knowing how to use it positively (and in holding the platforms to account for not moderating the spread of harmful viral trends and online abuse, and creating algorithms that deliberately create division and harm mental health... but that’s a story for another day). 
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But how can we expect our kids to have a handle on it when we, as adults, don’t ourselves? 
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I don’t believe the answer is to ban social media, but I don’t think kids should be given unfettered access to it either. 
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They need help navigating this stuff, learning about boundaries, developing media literacy skills so they can think critically about the content they’re consuming (just like many adults).
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And we also need to explore how we might be inadvertently contributing to the problem, perpetuating appearance ideals and creating a culture where kids learn it’s ok to body shame under the guise of health and to value each other based on the way they look.
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As ever, it’s complicated. I’d love to know what you think? What are some of the boundaries you have around social media in your house - both for yourself and your kids?
#BodyHappyKids 
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When I was pregnant with Effie I went to a pregnan When I was pregnant with Effie I went to a pregnancy yoga class every week. It was the highlight of my week. I left each session feeling like I was floating on a cloud, and I used the poses and breath work to guide me through labour too. But then I had my baby and found that, as a knackered new mum of two, I couldn’t find the time for yoga. I no longer had the excuse of doing it “for the bump” or “to prepare for labour”, so what was the point?
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It wasn’t until I started reinvesting in myself and unravelling the diet culture perspective on exercise that I found it again, along with running, which turned to hiking, and swimming. 
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It wasn’t about preparing my body for someone or something else. It was about the process itself, the time to unwind my mind and move my body for joy, just for me. I’ve lost a bit of that this past year with lockdowns, and I feel it.
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I recently signed up to @theunderbellyyoga with @mynameisjessamyn and feel like I’m finding it again. I love that my kids can see me taking time for myself, and enjoying movement, and that they sometimes want to join in too. Even if it is a bit annoying sometimes (swipe 👀). 
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#BodyHappyMum 
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[Image description: Molly and her 6 year old daughter Effie sit on yoga and gymnastics mats with their legs crossed and arms in the air. They have their backs to the camera. In the second image they are sitting crossed legged while twisting round to the side, and in the third image Molly is lying on the mat with her eyes closed while Effie leans over her, being a bit annoying.]
Health is complicated, yet it’s so often over-si Health is complicated, yet it’s so often over-simplified on social media. “Just eat less and move more!” etc are packaged up as empowering motivational quotes, but when we look into what health actually is, and the many things that impact it, we realise that this view isn’t empowering at all. 
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Any conversation about health that doesn’t acknowledge the fact of body diversity, social determinants of health and the impact of weight stigma and all forms of discrimination on health, is not a full conversation.
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When it comes to how this makes children feel about their bodies, the impact is huge. From appearance based bullying (both online and in the playground) to confusion over how best to look after their own health, we’re not equipping kids with the tools to feel good in their bodies or be accepting of other children in bodies that may not look the way we teach kids “healthy” looks. 
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Consider this as a “starter post”, an introduction to the “But what about health?” question if you’ve not come across a weight inclusive approach to health before. If it’s useful bookmark and come back to it. And maybe even share it if you think your friends and family might benefit from it too. 
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On the last slide you’ll find a short list of further reading. This is by no means an exhaustive list! Again, just a starting point. 
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There are professors, researchers, activists, educators, doctors, public health policy makers doing important work in this area (who have been leading the charge on this for decades, before social media was even a thing), but still the mainstream view on health always seems to come down to personal responsibility arguments and the “eat less, move more” approach. Just remember, it’s complicated. ❤️
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EDIT: On the last slide I recommend the book Burn Out - apologies for a typo to author name: it is written by Emily & AMELIA Nagoski 
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