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You are here: Home / MOTHERHOOD / Four lazy mum hacks for self-care parenting

Four lazy mum hacks for self-care parenting

March 26, 2018 by Molly 5 Comments

Confession: at least two days a week I turn into Lazy Mum. And you know what? Those are often two of my favourite days of the week.

On Lazy Mum days we eat a trash tea, the kids have unlimited screen time and there is – gasp – not one single organised activity. Basically, on these days I’m about as far from Pinterest Perfect Mum as you can get.

I like to think of Lazy Mum days as the “self care” essential for a stressed out mum. We’re all told about the benefits of giving ourselves a break, being “kind” to ourselves, living in the moment etc. But when you’re living life at 100 miles an hour, trying to speed clean your kitchen while whipping up a batch of freshly baked muffins, organising an educational craft activity and replying to that important work email, self care goes out the window.

Which is why, for me, the Lazy Mum hacks listed below are an important part of my parenting self care repertoire. Actively lowering my standards on these days is liberating, and I don’t even feel guilty. And you know what the side effect of that is? Happier kids.

So, without one ounce of guilt, I present to you some of my favourite lazy mum hacks…

1. Unlimited screen time

After school on a Friday the girls love to come home and just slob out. It’s the one day of the week when Freya doesn’t have any after school clubs and we don’t have to rush out of the door to be anywhere. When we get home the kids go on the iPad / tablet / sit in front of the TV and barely speak to each other (or me). There’s no limit on it and they have their tea in front of it too, glued to whatever’s on the screen. This doesn’t happen every day so it’s a treat – for them and for me (because it’s the one time I don’t have to nag them or face a tantrum).

2. Fancy dress as outfit of the day

Gone are the days when I could choose pretty co-ordinating outfits for my daughters. Effie now has clear ideas over what she wants to wear and – apart from the time it was snowing outside and she wanted to wear nothing but a swimming cozzie – I’m happy to go with it. Most days her outfit choice is a hugely random co-ordination, often involving a tutu or a Christmas jumper. I can’t be bothered with the tantrums of trying to coax her into a bright Boden outfit or an Instagrammable Next ensemble so I choose the Lazy Mum approach and let her dress herself, regardless of the fact her outfit might provoke some raised eyebrows when we’re out in public. She’s happy, I’m happy, we’re all happy.

3. Trash tea

Lazy Mum days are “trash tea” days. I rarely cook an elaborate meal on a Friday. The girls will often have pizza or fish-fingers and, because we don’t eat like this every day I feel not an ounce of guilt. They love it and often tell me Friday night tea is their favourite – especially as they get to eat it while watching the iPad or TV. Everything in moderation and all that.

4. Bath bombs / Gelli Baff

Bath time on a Friday is always fun, mainly because I can’t be bothered to negotiate a tantrum, so I let the kids do what they like. Often this will involve that awful stuff that turns bath water into jelly. Sometimes it might be a bath bomb they can drop into the bath. It will always take longer than usual because I’m not in a rush and – shock horror – often I’ll just leave them to it while I read a book or mindlessly scroll through Twitter on my phone.

5. Disaster naps

One of my favourite lazy mum hacks is to let my three year old nap on me. This achieves the double whammy of an enforced sit down for an hour or so, peace while she sleeps and avoidance of any play-doh related activities. Some people might gasp at the brazen lack of routine here, tutting at a nap in the afternoon that might ruin bedtime. Usually I’ll actively avoid the disaster nap situation due to fear of a late bedtime or simply because I’ve got too much to do to have time to sit underneath a sleeping three year old. But on Lazy Mum Days I welcome the nap with open arms, sod the consequences.

See some of these hacks in action in my latest vlog – this one’s a raw Day In The Life video…

Filed Under: Kids, MOTHERHOOD Tagged With: happiness, happy mum, happy parents, lazy mum, mum hacks, mum life, Parenting, real mum life

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Comments

  1. MummyNeverSleeps says

    April 9, 2018 at 9:37 pm

    LOVING these actual proper hacks I can relate to! Totally an advocate of trash tea Fridays here too x

    Reply
  2. Sarah Rooftops says

    March 27, 2018 at 8:03 pm

    I must be the laziest mum around because this describes most days in my house! It’s not just self-care, though – it’s kid care, too. It’s important to teach them to take time out from Achieving Things, to relax sometimes and to do things because they’re fun rather than educational/impressive – then perhaps their generation will be less stressed out than ours is! But yes to self-care, too.

    Reply
    • Molly says

      March 28, 2018 at 10:23 am

      I completely agree!

      Reply
  3. Sarah | Boo Roo and Tigger Too says

    March 27, 2018 at 8:26 am

    I’m loving these hacks. I currently have my two year watching Despicable Me 3 (again) whilst she climbs all over me. Thankfully I can still manage to do some things via my phone

    Reply
    • Molly says

      March 28, 2018 at 10:24 am

      Your two year old sounds very like Effie! xx

      Reply

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Hello and welcome! I'm Molly Forbes - podcaster, presenter and blogger with a passion for positivity, confidence and body image chat. Regularly writing and vlogging about empowering female issues from a motherhood angle, I also cover lifestyle and fashion topics for like-minded mums who want to rediscover themselves after having children. Thanks for stopping by! Read More…

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If you feel bad about your body you’re less like If you feel bad about your body you’re less likely to do nice things for it, including moving in a way that feels good and eating in a way that feels good. (FYI health is about more than just exercise and nutrition, but let’s get deeper into the exercise thing for a second...)
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Research shows kids who have low body image are less likely to get involved with sports and more likely to skip PE. 
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Want kids to move more? Stop teaching them that one type of body is better than another - because if their body doesn’t look like your version of a healthy / beautiful / successful body not only will they be more likely to feel shame over their body, they’ll be less likely to engage with the very behaviours you want them to do more of (or be more likely to engage with them in an UNhealthy way - compulsive exercise is dangerous).
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Instead:
💕Try talking about the intrinsic benefits of exercise over the extrinsic ones (ie. how it makes you FEEL instead of how it makes you LOOK).
✨Create opportunities for movement where ALL children feel welcome. 
💕Show children diverse representation so they can see sporting heroes with a range of body types and know that movement is for EVERYbody. 
✨Take a zero tolerance approach to appearance based bullying, body shaming and comments that perpetuate weight stigma (including even the hint that fat = bad). 
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(If you’re a teacher or youth leader interested in knowing more about this topic, a #BodyHappyKids workshop will help - follow the link in my bio 🥰❤️)
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[Image description: A multicoloured slide with an overlaid screenshot of tweet by Molly which reads ‘If your intention is to “get kids healthy” then you need to be aware of how weight bias, weight stigma and poor body image are active barriers to health. The end.]
Sharing this outfit pic with you because it’s a Sharing this outfit pic with you because it’s a crying shame only the piles of laundry got to see it, quite frankly. Finally, a pair of pre-loved jeans bought online that are true to size, consistent with the rest of the brand’s sizing and actually fit! 🎉 
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PS heads up - I’ll be doing a Q&A about body image and kids in my Stories on Friday. The Q sticker is up in my Stories now if you’d like to submit a Q! 💕 #BodyHappyKids
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[Image description: Molly is standing in front of the mirror looking very pleased with the fact her new jeans bought from Depop fit her. She is wearing pink patterned jeans with cherubs on them, a pink check jumper and pink trainers. There are piles of laundry on the bed behind her.]
Another photo of us on a walk, because it’s been Another photo of us on a walk, because it’s been our main form of entertainment this year. Anyone else? 
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I honestly now get excited about putting my boots on and being outdoors, even in the rain. I’m going to start hugging trees next and going on wild camping weekends that involve doing a poo behind a tree and making my own fire. Joke.... maybe. 
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Just another reminder that all movement is valid, exercise doesn’t need to have to be about burning calories or even tracking steps in order for it to be “worth it”. Hope everyone’s had a great weekend ❤️
#BodyHappyMum #JoyfulMovement
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Image description: Molly and her two daughters stand on a bridge in the countryside. They are all wearing hiking boots and outdoor clothes and smiling.
My body is good and excellent and my body only bel My body is good and excellent and my body only belongs to me ✨ (Words by Effie May, age 6 💕) #BodyHappyMum
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Image description: A close up of Molly’s bare skin as she hugs herself. It’s dark and part of her body is illuminated by light. She has her eyes closed and is smiling.
“Mummy I wrote a letter to myself,” she said. “Mummy I wrote a letter to myself,” she said. And my heart swelled. Maybe I’m doing an OK job after all 🤞❤️💕 #BodyHappyKids 
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I could leave this caption here but I need to make something clear: if you think it’s great that my daughter - a thin, white, nondisabled, cisgender kid - feels good in her body but you’re not here for the self-love of any kid who doesn’t look like her.... then you’ve missed the point.
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ALL bodies are good bodies, and without this important piece of the puzzle ALL children will be at risk of doubting their body. And what happens when they doubt their body? Well... hating our body doesn’t make us treat it with love, and the same is true of kids. 
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Great, now we’ve cleared that up, can we take a moment to appreciate the incredible phonetic spelling on show here?! 
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Image description: Effie, age 6, stands against a white wardrobe holding up a letter she has written to herself. It is spelled phonetically and reads “My body is good and excellent and my body only belongs to me.”
I used to struggle to buy stuff for myself if I ha I used to struggle to buy stuff for myself if I had any spare cash - not just treats, but basics like pants and tights that fit properly. I’d tell myself I didn’t need it, didn’t deserve it, couldn’t justify the expense. There’s still that little voice (the habit of putting everyone else’s needs first and my own last dies hard it seems) but I’m leaning into exploring why it still sometimes rears its head, instead of always listening to it. 
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I’m trying to buy as much as I can from pre-loved places or small businesses these days, which is why I’m very happy to share with you some of my latest finds: a star dress from Depop (£5), earrings from @kelzojewellery by @ourtransitionallife (£12) and the comfiest tights I’ve ever owned in Raspberry Pie by @snagtights (£6.99) 💕💕💕
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Have you found any great small brands lately? Shout them out in the comments so we can all support in the run up to Christmas. ⬇️⚡️
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Image description: Molly is smiling and sticking out her tongue to the camera. Her hair is freshly dyed a light shade of pink. She’s wearing a pink t’shirt underneath a black and white star patterned slip dress, with bright pink tights and black and pink earrings decorated with a boob design.
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