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You are here: Home / PLAY / The Sand House

The Sand House

January 6, 2013 by Molly 2 Comments

Sandcastles on New Year's Day

Dear Frog,

As I write this it’s January 2013. You are two and a half years old and tucked up fast asleep in bed.

But by the time (if) you come to read this letter and story by yourself, these days of toddler dictatorship will likely be a distant memory.

Gone will be the evenings when you liked a bedtime story from your mum. I expect you’re now into having “your own space” and find me desperately uncool. Sorry about that.

As uncool as I probably am, I’d like to tell you a story. It’s one you like at the age of two.

This story wasn’t written down in a book. There are no pictures, except for the ones in your head. It’s a story I made up a couple of weeks ago when you couldn’t get to sleep.

It’s now your favourite and you regularly ask for it. Much to your delight, I’ll sit by your bed and stroke the hair away from your face while I softly tell you about the house made of sand. Over and over again. (You’re not very good at accepting when the story has come to an end.)

Anyway, here it is.

***

The Sand House

Freya was two years old. She had a mummy and a daddy and a cuddly toy she liked to call Geoffrey. He was new.

Freya lived in a very old house. It was so old it had wonky walls and rickety floorboards. The house was near fields and a river. But there was no beach. Freya liked the beach.

In the summer, Freya would sit in a sandpit in her little garden and pretend she was at the beach, but it wasn’t the same. There was no sea for starters. And no shells.

One morning Freya woke up to find her mummy and daddy very busy, trying to pack all her favourite things into a big suitcase. “No Mummy!” She cried. She didn’t like her things being messed with.

“We’re going on an adventure to visit your grandparents in their new house,” explained Freya’s mum. “Now be good and sit still in your car seat”.

Freya stopped fidgeting and looked out of the car window. She saw fields and bikes and trees before drifting off to sleep.

When she woke up, she could hear something loud and rumbly.

Whoosh. Whoosh. Whoosh.

Freya was scared. She opened one eye and saw lots and lots of blue. There was blue sky and blue water. Everywhere.

“Wake up Freya,” said Freya’s daddy. “This is the seaside.”

That afternoon Freya played on the beach. She built castles of sand and collected shells, placing them carefully in a little plastic bucket. She dipped her toes in the cold sea and laughed as the waves tickled her feet.

Freya spent every day doing the same thing. She played on the beach with her mum and dad, her grandma and her granddad.

But then it was time to go home, back to her little house by the river and the field. She didn’t want to go. She wanted to stay by the sea always.

As the sea whispered and whooshed, Freya’s daddy had an idea. “I could make a house!” he said. “We can’t afford a big house on the hill, but I could make one right here, on the sand.”

And with that, he got to work. Freya’s dad worked all night.

While she slept in her warm, cosy bed at grandma’s house, Freya’s daddy made lots of bricks of sand and placed them one on top of the other. By the time Freya woke up in the morning, she had a new house. It was a big house, made entirely of sand.

As Freya walked around her new sand house she gasped with excitement. She had a sand bed and a sand window, a sand rug and a sand chair.

Every night, Freya fell to sleep as the waves Whoosh Whooshed and the moon made patterns that danced on the water.

The house wasn’t perfect though. Freya often found sand in her cereal and socks. Her sand bed was a bit itchy and she could never shut the sand window to keep out the Whoosh Whoosh of the sea.

After a while, Freya decided she didn’t want to live in a sand house any more. Packing up her suitcase, she waved goodbye to her mummy and daddy and moved in next door with her grandparents, back to her warm and cosy bed.

Unfortunately, there wasn’t enough room for everyone.

Freya’s mummy and daddy had to make do with sandy cereal and sandy socks forever more. But sometimes, when Freya was feeling generous, she’d bring them a sandwich for breakfast from Grandma’s house.

She was nice like that.

** The End **

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Filed Under: PLAY Tagged With: beach, bedtime, sand, story, toddler story

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Comments

  1. Tanya (bump2basics) says

    January 7, 2013 at 1:21 am

    I remember my mom telling me stories as a child and now enjoy doing the same for my daughter. It’s nice to let them paint the pictures in their heads. This is a great story and it’s lovely you captured it here for evermore.

    Reply
    • Molly says

      January 7, 2013 at 7:55 pm

      Ah thank you, I’m thinking of printing it off along with some of the photos of her on the beach – although I like the idea of her painting her own pictures too.

      Reply

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Hello and welcome! I'm Molly Forbes - podcaster, presenter and blogger with a passion for positivity, confidence and body image chat. Regularly writing and vlogging about empowering female issues from a motherhood angle, I also cover lifestyle and fashion topics for like-minded mums who want to rediscover themselves after having children. Thanks for stopping by! Read More…

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Dear PE teachers (and everyone), don’t do this 💔
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If you’re a PE teacher and you’re interested in engaging more kids in class then lose the diet culture and body shaming messaging - even if it’s meant in jest. Research shows kids who feel comfortable in their body are more likely to take part in sports, and movement is for ALL bodies, not just the kids with super athletic toned ones. 
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Want more insight and help with this stuff? Sign up to a Body Happy Kids workshop - we’ve got you. Oh, and read Train Happy by @tallyrye in the meantime.
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And parents - if your kids experience this type of messaging in their school setting absolutely challenge it. We’ve got a template letter on the #FreeFromDiets website you can tweak and a downloadable info pack about the workshops you can send to your school if you’d like them to sign up. Just hit the Workshops link in my bio and scroll down towards the bottom of the page.
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Creating a body happy setting can: 
⚡️increase engagement in class 
⚡️increase engagement in movement 
⚡️increase academic attainment 
⚡️increase happiness, confidence and overall wellbeing
⚡️help kids be more likely to engage in health promoting behaviours 
(And that’s just for starters).
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PS. I’m not coming for teachers - my husband is one. BUT research shows weight bias is often more common in PE teachers than other subject areas so this is a conversation worth having. 
#BodyHappyKids
I turn 37 in three weeks. When I was younger I use I turn 37 in three weeks. When I was younger I used to think 37 was old. It was “grown-up”, boring, over-the-hill. 
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By the time you were 37 you had your life figured out, wore sensible clothes and had waved goodbye to the fun stuff. 
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It’s no surprise I thought that really. Women aged 37 and over - particularly mums - were invisible. The only representations of older women on screen were the matriarchs. Ad campaigns and magazines featured young women in their “prime” (side note: 🤮 hate that phrase - what does “prime” even mean? We’re not cuts of meat. “Prime” baby making age? Is making babies all we’re good for?!)
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There was no space for any other version of women over 35. Women over 35 weren’t playful, fun, adventurous, sexual, curious. Women over 35 were Responsible, Sensible, Dutiful.
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Well that’s not what 37 is going to look like for me. Sure I do school runs and meet deadlines and wash smelly socks. But I also play and dance and adventure and enjoy my body. I feel like I’m just getting going to be honest. 
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37 is going to be a big year. I’m excited. I’m ready. And I’m certainly not invisible. Bring it on.
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#BirthdayCountdown #MumsGoneWild
Every year @GirlGuiding publishes something called Every year @GirlGuiding publishes something called the Girls’ Attitudes Survey. It’s a big piece of research into the thoughts and feelings of the girls in their community and gives an insight into some of the things that are important to girls and young women in the UK today. 
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The early findings of the 2020 survey have been released and the headline is (surprise, surprise) girls feel under intense pressure to look a certain way and it’s damaging their confidence and wellbeing. 
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Here are some of the stats:
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⚡️80% of girls and young women have considered changing how they look. 
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⚡️51% of girls aged 7-10 believe women are judged more on what they look like than what they can do (this figure is up from 35% in 2016).
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There’s also the finding that two thirds of girls support legislation to stop them seeing ads for diet products and weight loss clubs. 
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It makes for pretty devastating reading but is worth looking at, particularly if you have a daughter - I’ll link to the early findings in my Stories and the full report will be out next month.
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These girls are telling us not only do they feel this intense pressure to look a certain way, but that it’s causing them pain. They are telling us they don’t want the pressure, the ads, the constant barrage of negativity making them feel insecure about their appearance and their body. It’s costing them their wellbeing, confidence and health. 
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It’s time to listen.
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Sign the #FreeFromDiets petition. Tell your kids’ school about the Body Happy Kids Workshop for teachers. Call out diet culture when you see it (particularly when it comes for your kids). There are more resources in my bio as well as a post on media literacy further down my grid too. It doesn’t have to be this way. 💕✨ #BodyHappyKids
My babies started Year 1 & Year 6 today and as I w My babies started Year 1 & Year 6 today and as I waved them off to school after months of being home, it got me thinking about how my relationship with their first home has changed: my body. ❤️
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I have thin privilege but I’ve still often felt like my body was “wrong”. Why? Because like many of us I live in a society that taught me to fear fatness and idolise thinness from an early age. 
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Internalised fatphobia ran so deep that even after my body performed its most miraculous feat of my life - growing and birthing a human - I feared the softness of my belly.
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I justified the internalised fat phobia by telling myself it was about health, believing that health was a simplified concept I could control and monitor by a number on the scales. 
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And even when I started to suspect diets weren’t healthy I still failed to recognise the total system of oppression that diet culture is, how it harms so very many people including children, how it creates a culture where discriminating against people over their weight is seen as acceptable under the guise of health concern.
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I believe we will never end body-based oppression until we do the internal work too, rejecting diet culture & internalised fat phobia. Then we can challenge the health “facts” we’re sold by a multi billion £ industry, and investigate why we’re so ready to accept government diet culture infused health policy when we’re quick to question other policies.
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It starts with us showing body acceptance to our children, teaching them ALL bodies are good bodies, giving them the tools to question anyone who says otherwise. 
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This is not just about raising children at peace in their body. It’s about raising children who grow to challenge a system that harms us all, but particularly those in marginalised bodies. 
.
For me, it started with exploring my feelings about my babies’ first home. ❤️
A little story about 🩸periods🩸 and intuitive A little story about 🩸periods🩸 and intuitive movement and diet culture - here’s the headline: DIET CULTURE MESSES UP OUR RELATIONSHIP WITH OUR BODY AND THIS HARM RUNS DEEP.
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Let me explain. 
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This was me last week. We hiked up a hill and when we got to the top the sky turned a murky shade of grey. Within seconds we were being pelted by hail and rain. It was GLORIOUS. I felt ALIVE.
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Not so this week. Because this week I got my period. And instead of relaxing into it, being gentle with myself, I battled it. I got frustrated with myself when exhaustion hit and my brain felt soupy. I tried to dig deep to find my spark, my energy, I felt guilt at missing swim sessions I’d booked. 
.
Why? Because diet culture runs deep. I examined it and realised I was feeling guilt at what I’d told myself I “should” be doing, rather than what my body *actually* needed. “No one regrets a workout! It’ll pep you up! Energise you!” Said the voice. But my body was bleeding and I was tired to my bones. I didn’t feel like it. And I felt like I was letting some invisible person down. 
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Last night I gave myself permission to be gentle. Cancelled all my swim sessions for a couple of days. Had a bath and put on my comfiest PJs. Turned off my laptop and phone, watched a film and had an early night. It’s what my body needed, and once I actually listened to it I felt so much better. 
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Embracing the seasons of my cycle and going with my natural energy levels is how I’m reclaiming my relationship with my body, I’ve decided. For me, this is the last internal bastion of rebellion against diet culture. And it’s (literally) bloody liberating 🩸⚡️💥
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#BodyHappyMum #JoyfulMovement #DevonIsHeaven #PeriodPower #WeBleed
No child comes fresh out the womb doubting their b No child comes fresh out the womb doubting their body. But, little by little, the messages come.
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Some of the messages may be from what they see online on TV and in magazines. Some of them may even come from the people who love and care for them - their friends, parents, grandparents, teachers and even doctors. Some of the messages are blatant and some are more insidious.
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It’s not hopeless though. Here are some things you can do, right now:
✨ Speak to yourself with kindness or use neutral language about your own body in front of your kids.
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✨Call out the messages when you see them - point them out and talk about what they’re promoting, and show your kids the other perspective. This is called media literacy and I’ve got a post further down my grid with lots more info on this.
.
✨ Teach your kids that beauty and health don’t just look one way, and that regardless of the outside shell of our body all humans deserve respect, empathy and love - and that includes self-love. (Some mantras that I use with my kids to help drive this message home - ALL bodies are GOOD bodies 💕 It’s not your job to be pretty 💕 Your body is YOUR OWN.)
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✨ Seek out wider representation, whether that’s through books, social media accounts, positive TV shows and films, it all matters.
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✨ Set clear boundaries - if you have a family member or friend who constantly discusses diets, body shames themselves or makes comments about other people’s bodies (and maybe even your child’s) have a conversation with them about why this isn’t OK. Explain that little ears are always listening and you’re working hard to raise your kids to have a happy, healthy relationship with their body. 
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For more resources on this check out the links in my bio ❤️
#BodyHappyKids
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[📸 My one day old daughter’s foot in my hand, taken in 2010, by @carolinepalmerphoto]
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