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You are here: Home / STYLE / Beauty / Treating myself, just because

Treating myself, just because

November 21, 2013 by Molly 17 Comments

Do you ever find that, as a parent, you put yourself at the bottom of the list? I do. Constantly. Whether it’s drinking a cup of tea while it’s still hot or giving myself the luxury of more than two minutes in the shower, I’m not very good at being kind to myself. To be honest, I always think “be kind to yourself” sounds a bit sappy. I’m more of the “buckle down and get on with it” school of thought. I blame it on my northern husband.

I was recently given the opportunity to test out the site Topcashback. As the name suggests, you earn cash back on your purchases through the site. Lots of retailers are signed up – from fashion brands to utilities companies. Each retailer offers different amounts of money back, from the odd percent right up to as much as 20 percent. The money comes from the commission they pay Topcashback for your custom (you click a link to their site through Topcashback), some of which is then paid back into your own account. Anyway, I had planned to buy something for Christmas – maybe a present for my three year old or something to decorate the house with. But I didn’t. 

Instead, I spent the money on something rather frivolous. A little bit of luxury that I’ve been hankering after for a while.

Towels

These towels are like a glimmering symbol of change.

OK, that may be a bit dramatic, but they are a big deal. Let me tell you why: I am rubbish at treating myself. Whenever I spend money on something that we don’t really need then I get a pang of guilt. It’s ridiculous, but true.

So the £80.50 I spent on 3 bath towels, 2 hand towels and a swanky bath mat is a momentous occasion. And for that £80.50, I received £3.51 cash back. That’s £3.51 I wouldn’t have had if I had bought directly from the retailer. I am stemming the flow of guilt further by the fact I made a saving of £12.50 on the towels, as the original price would have come to £93. So, I am £16.01 better off than I would have been. I’m calling it an early Christmas present to myself.

Regardless of the savings, sometimes you do need to be kind to yourself. I’ve learned that the hard way this week. Five nights in a row of four hours’ sleep, in two hour increments, has taken its toll. Frog has been poorly, stuck at home with me and reverting to newborn sleeping patterns. When my mum rang this morning to ask how things were I just snapped. I don’t know what it is about hearing my mum’s voice but, if I’m on the edge of an emotional meltdown, it always sends me into floods of tears!

As I write this, I’m sitting in my parents’ kitchen, with my daughter sleeping soundly upstairs. I had to come here to get some work done and catch up on some sleep, with my parents giving me a hand to keep my poorly-but-not-really-poorly three year old occupied. Buying these towels has given me a much-needed boost. Never underestimate the power of a little treat.

“Egyptian cotton”, “luxurious” and “everyday indulgence” are the words used to describe these towels of joy. If they could sing, I imagine they would crack out a sweet angelic melody that would soothe you off into a blissful sleep. I may be placing high expectations on these beauties, but I don’t care. Sometimes you have to splurge a bit.

If they’re lucky, I may even let the daughter and husband use them too.

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Disclosure: Thanks to Topcashback for giving me the chance to be a bit frivolous. In order to write this post, I was given money towards my purchase through Topcashback. All opinions remain my own. 

Filed Under: Beauty, Fashion, STYLE Tagged With: savings, shopping, treats

« Granny chic and a bit of ethical shopping
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Comments

  1. Northernmum says

    November 29, 2013 at 10:28 pm

    I think you should treat me, just because x

    Reply
  2. Jayne says

    November 24, 2013 at 3:10 pm

    Ooh, we’re going to treat ourselves to some new towels in the January sales this year as all of ours are looking pretty worn these days, so I might see what The White Company has after Christmas.

    Reply
    • Molly says

      November 25, 2013 at 7:49 pm

      Do it! They have good reductions now though – so luxurious!

      Reply
  3. Stacey Corrin says

    November 23, 2013 at 11:00 pm

    What is it about us parents that encourages us to feel so guilty at the smallest of little luxuries? I am exactly the same. I actually found myself saying to my other half today, “No, no please DONT buy me an iPad for Christmas, I don’t really need one and it’s so expensive.” What the hell is wrong with me?

    Perhaps I should ask for towels instead. 🙂

    Reply
    • Molly says

      November 25, 2013 at 7:49 pm

      Towels that only YOU can use…

      Reply
  4. maggy, red ted art says

    November 23, 2013 at 8:43 pm

    Ooh nothing quite like fresh white towels! I have towel envy right now!

    Reply
  5. alexander residence says

    November 23, 2013 at 6:53 pm

    Oh Molly, pour a bath, a wine and add lots of bubbles you have earnt it! Well done for treating yourself, we need to! Wrote a post about this very topic myself this week!

    Reply
  6. Emma @mummymummymum says

    November 23, 2013 at 5:51 pm

    ooooh, I do like a nice towel, and The White Company. *Jealous face*

    Reply
  7. Ali at Kids Chaos says

    November 23, 2013 at 5:47 pm

    Sounds like you need a hot bath, some candles… and those lovely towels ALL to yourself… hope you get to enjoy them soon, don’t share them 🙂 x

    Reply
  8. Sonya Cisco says

    November 23, 2013 at 5:43 pm

    I could so with some decent towels! I was amazed how easy topcashback was to use, will definitely be using it regularly from now on. Hope you got some sleep eventually! x

    Reply
  9. Mari says

    November 23, 2013 at 2:48 pm

    Oh dear my towel cupboard is in dire need of a complete overhaul. I know what you mean about the treats and the guilt that follows, maybe using Topcash would help me too. I’ll have to have a nosey around won’t I?

    Reply
  10. Kirsty says

    November 23, 2013 at 12:34 pm

    I have the same inability to spend money on myself. Everything goes on the littl’un. But look at it this way, you have earned cash back and you will use them every day so actually on a price per use basis they were a steal!

    Reply
  11. jenny paulin says

    November 23, 2013 at 11:25 am

    ohhh you are sooooo right i would LOVE to treat myself to some new luxurious towells but no point while the boys are young as they wouldnt stay luxurious for long lol
    well done you for treating yourself x

    Reply
  12. Nikki Thomas says

    November 23, 2013 at 10:49 am

    Oh I totally get your thinking! My MIL bought us some lovely towels for Christmas a few years ago and the difference was amazing! I will have to check out Topcashback as I do so much of my shopping online .

    Reply
  13. Mammasaurus says

    November 23, 2013 at 10:48 am

    Ahhh soft fluffy towels! I quite fancy a set that the kids aren’t allowed – they are never the same once they start wiping their tomato saucey mouth in them are they?

    Reply
  14. Grenglish says

    November 23, 2013 at 10:46 am

    I have put new towels on my Christmas list this year! There is no better feeling on a cold winter’s day than getting out of a nice hot bath and wrapping a new fluffy towel around you. If my 20-something self could see me now, she would hide her face and cringe!

    Great that you actually made some money out of it too, everyone’s a winner!

    Reply

Trackbacks

  1. The Topcashback Online Shopping Challenge | Tots 100 says:
    December 6, 2013 at 9:01 am

    […] no rule that says you have to spend your Superpoints on someone else – Molly from Mother’s Always Right indulged in some gorgeous towels from The White Company – at just over £80, Molly saved […]

    Reply

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Hello and welcome! I'm Molly Forbes - podcaster, presenter and blogger with a passion for positivity, confidence and body image chat. Regularly writing and vlogging about empowering female issues from a motherhood angle, I also cover lifestyle and fashion topics for like-minded mums who want to rediscover themselves after having children. Thanks for stopping by! Read More…

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I am not “bossing” it. Or “slaying”. Or “hustling”. Or “smashing” it. I’m not even juggling or spinning plates or doing any of the other words we use as a glossy, marketable, Instagram friendly way to package up burnout culture, under the guise of “empowering” women (💪🤢). 
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What I have been doing, though, is working too hard. Call a spade a spade. I’ve been working too hard, neglecting my health, my relationships, my life away from my laptop. I cannot be everything to everyone AND work at the level I’ve been working at BECAUSE I AM A HUMAN BEING. And you are too. We are not robots.
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I care deeply about all my work, and things aren’t always this intense, but I wanted to sprinkle some reality into the Gram because I am so over this lie that *any* type of success or achievement doesn’t come at a cost, or involve many failures in the background, or require many other people to help make things happen. 
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I guess what I’m saying is, let’s be real about all that, as well as showing the achievements. I’m bloody proud of my book. And I’m so excited to launch the social enterprise @bodyhappyorg properly next month. But that doesn’t mean it’s easy, and that there isn’t a price. 
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And with that, I’m taking the weekend off. See you on the other side 🥰🥰🥰
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[Image description: Molly sits in her office with her hands covering her mouth. On the back of one hand is written “Not bossing it”. She is wearing a pink boiler suit with a black and white top underneath. She has pink leopard print earrings on and her hair is tied back.]
This was taken at the start of half term, when the This was taken at the start of half term, when the kids were still enthusiastic about going for a walk. 1,705 walks around the same bit of countryside later... not so much 😬 
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If you’re struggling to get your kids motivated to move their body at the moment, go gentle. You’re not alone. Bad weather coupled with boredom coupled with the lure of screens is a heady recipe for lethargy - and that’s just me! 
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Seriously though, remember: all movement is valid. Even if it’s just a ten minute @cosmickids sesh or a little kitchen disco, it all counts. And if it comes from a place of enjoyment and fun, kids (and adults!) are going to be far more likely to want to get involved.
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What joyful movement activities are your kids enjoying right now (if any?!)?
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[Image description: Molly and her two daughters are standing in a field. They’re wearing colourful wellies, holding hands and smiling.]
I founded a social enterprise 😵 . Introducing: I founded a social enterprise 😵
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Introducing: @bodyhappyorg 🎉
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We are a Community Interest Company dedicated to promoting positive body image in children. We help adults help the kids in their care be friends with their bodies 🥰. 
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Through workshops and classes, digital and physical resources (both free and paid) we help parents, carers, teachers, youth leaders - and any adults who are ever around children - create body happy settings for kids to thrive in. 
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We launch officially next month with a beautiful new website and lots of resources which we’ll continually be adding to. In the meantime give us a follow at @bodyhappyorg - we start posting from today and our page has been designed as a free resource on its own! 
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I’m privileged to work alongside an incredible team of people on this. Shout-out to the original dream team @chelseacoxstrategist @amysnellingpt @effinitupfaye @lottie_storey @bodyconfidencecards_db @rachel_hobnobs & @aceandping 💕 LOVE YOU ALL! 💕
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[Image description: A blue square with yellow and white text which reads “the body happy org”. This is the logo for The Body Happy Organisation CIC]
Proof that I did wear clothes other than a tea-sta Proof that I did wear clothes other than a tea-stained hoodie and tracksuit bottoms at least once in the past month 😐
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[Image description: Molly is wearing pink dungarees with yellow buttons over a black rollneck long-sleeved top. She has a monochrome striped hairband on and her hair is pink. She is also wearing earrings with boobs on them. She looks very pleased, both with her earrings, the pink hair and the fact she’s not wearing sleepwear, for a change.]
A new report from the Education Policy Institute h A new report from the Education Policy Institute has concluded an obvious gender divide in the well-being of young adults. If you’d like to read more check out this article by Eleanor Peake in @newstatesman (I’ve linked to it in my Stories).
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Every week I get messages from parents and teachers concerned about the impact of social media on their kids’ body image. And of course, I couldn’t write a book about body image in kids and teens without covering social media - there’s a whole chapter in Body Happy Kids dedicated to the subject. 
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The thing is, social media isn’t going anywhere. And just like it can be a force for anxiety, shame and general angst it can be a force for good too. The trick is in knowing how to use it positively (and in holding the platforms to account for not moderating the spread of harmful viral trends and online abuse, and creating algorithms that deliberately create division and harm mental health... but that’s a story for another day). 
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But how can we expect our kids to have a handle on it when we, as adults, don’t ourselves? 
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I don’t believe the answer is to ban social media, but I don’t think kids should be given unfettered access to it either. 
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They need help navigating this stuff, learning about boundaries, developing media literacy skills so they can think critically about the content they’re consuming (just like many adults).
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And we also need to explore how we might be inadvertently contributing to the problem, perpetuating appearance ideals and creating a culture where kids learn it’s ok to body shame under the guise of health and to value each other based on the way they look.
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As ever, it’s complicated. I’d love to know what you think? What are some of the boundaries you have around social media in your house - both for yourself and your kids?
#BodyHappyKids 
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[Full text in Alt Text]
When I was pregnant with Effie I went to a pregnan When I was pregnant with Effie I went to a pregnancy yoga class every week. It was the highlight of my week. I left each session feeling like I was floating on a cloud, and I used the poses and breath work to guide me through labour too. But then I had my baby and found that, as a knackered new mum of two, I couldn’t find the time for yoga. I no longer had the excuse of doing it “for the bump” or “to prepare for labour”, so what was the point?
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It wasn’t until I started reinvesting in myself and unravelling the diet culture perspective on exercise that I found it again, along with running, which turned to hiking, and swimming. 
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It wasn’t about preparing my body for someone or something else. It was about the process itself, the time to unwind my mind and move my body for joy, just for me. I’ve lost a bit of that this past year with lockdowns, and I feel it.
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I recently signed up to @theunderbellyyoga with @mynameisjessamyn and feel like I’m finding it again. I love that my kids can see me taking time for myself, and enjoying movement, and that they sometimes want to join in too. Even if it is a bit annoying sometimes (swipe 👀). 
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#BodyHappyMum 
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[Image description: Molly and her 6 year old daughter Effie sit on yoga and gymnastics mats with their legs crossed and arms in the air. They have their backs to the camera. In the second image they are sitting crossed legged while twisting round to the side, and in the third image Molly is lying on the mat with her eyes closed while Effie leans over her, being a bit annoying.]
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