It was so easy when she was this small.
But somehow, this tiny little bundle has magically transformed into an 18 month old. An 18 month old who knows what she wants. An 18 month old who knows how to push all her mother’s buttons.
It’s a cliche, the whole “they don’t come with an instruction manual” thing. But that’s all I’ve thought about today.
I’ve been dreaming of a secret book, revealing the inner workings of a non-toddling toddler’s mind.
This book would, obviously, chastise me for losing my temper and raising my voice in the direction of my child this afternoon, as she had yet another tantrum at the sound of that so hated word “No”. And, clearly, this book would instruct myself and the (self-proclaimed) Northern Love Machine to never EVER disagree about how to handle a situation – especially in front of our child.
But that bloody book doesn’t exist. So while I scrabble around in search of the magic answers, I’ll just have to continue getting it all wrong.
And if you know where the secret book resides, feel free to let me know. I need all the help I can get.
My mum is forever giving me books that promise to be the instruction manual I’m always looking for. When I have a chance to read even a page of any of them, I’ll let you know.
Eeek Iyla hasn’t started having tantrums yet but I get annoyed even when she moans a lot for no reason sometimes! Maybe speak to your hubby about coming up with a plan that you agree on together because I do think that agreeing on the same method is important otherwise you end with the whole good cop / bad cop thing! I wouldn’t worry too much though, no-ones perfect and it’s not possible to get it right all the time. It sounds like you are doing a great job 🙂 x
I agree on the agreeing thing. Not always easy in the heat of the moment though!
The Giggle Monster has gone from crying and throwing himself on the floor when I say ‘no’ to laughing in my face. Hmmm. Not sure which one I prefer. The only advice I can give is the tool of ‘distract and divert attention’. I’m not sure if this phrase came from my teaching years or from some parenting programme, but it’s my first port of call every time there is a tantrum. It works 9/10 times, even on my 4 year old. x
I definitely need to get better at this technique!
I myself have secretly wondered if there was such a manual in existence. I have moments when after I put my 20 month old to bed and I’m looking at him in awe a wonder if I could have given him more that day. But all we can do is our best, we are only human. Those times that he comes up to me all on his own to give me a big hug and kiss (while saying ‘muah’) feels like his giving me a thumbs up. And it makes me smile inside and out!
I needed more moments like that today, I have to say. I’m glad to hear I’m not the only one who wonders though!
If it’s any comfort, you’ll never feel you’re doing it right. A nine-year old may be more eloquent than a toddler, but is equally stubborn. It’s just that the stubbornness takes the form of raunchy teenage clothing and Lady Gaga’s sexual fantasies on the ipod, instead of Haribo warfare.
Oh dear. And then they’re teenagers. *sigh*
Just keep doing what you’re doing and your troublesome toddler will learn and make it through the tantrums, despite the odd break down
Here’s hoping!
Poppet you don’t need a book you need a full time nanny x
I do. Or someone to do my job for me. Or just another me. Or a child who never throws horrendous tantrums. Know where I can find any of these things?!