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You are here: Home / MOTHERHOOD / Mum life is boring sometimes… isn’t it?

Mum life is boring sometimes… isn’t it?

February 24, 2017 by Molly 1 Comment

The thing about having small children is that it’s a constant reminder of how quickly time passes. The oft repeated mantra “the days are long but the years are short” is so true. Still, I feel like I need to get this off my chest because I’m sure I can’t be the only one to ever think this: mum life is so boring sometimes. Isn’t it?

Before you shoot me down for not appreciating my kids, let me tell you I love my kids just as hard as any other parent I know. I’d walk over hot coals for them, gladly throw myself in front of a train etc etc. BUT. But. The daily minutiae of life with two little people can, at times, be bone-crushingly dull.

It’s not that my kids aren’t entertaining. They make me howl with laughter and tear my hair out with frustration on a regular basis. Every day in fact. But the routine, the morning cajoling to get dressed, the regular moments of fraught patience and repeated arguments over the same old things (“put your shoes on” / “sit at the table for dinner” / “no we can’t take ten million toys on the school run”) sometimes feel like I’m living in Groundhog day.

And then there’s the routine. We’ve seen it all a million times before. Every day can feel the same. The walk to school, the toddler activities, the afternoon nap and work time, the same school run, the tea, bath, bed dance. These are the things that make up everyday life, the things I do week in week out. And it’s not always fun. It’s not awful. It’s just… a bit boring sometimes. Isn’t it?

I know there’ll be some reading this thinking I don’t know how lucky I am. I have two healthy girls, a brilliant husband, live in a lovely part of the world and enough food in my fridge to feed my family. I’m not being ungrateful for my life. I love my life. But I think it’s OK to admit that life isn’t a film. And real life for many of us isn’t all-singing all-dancing joy – no matter how much our Instagram feeds might suggest otherwise.

I made a Day In The Life video for my YouTube channel a couple of days ago and, editing it, it hit me how similar our days are. I’m not stupid, I know these are our glory days. I’m well aware that in years gone by I’ll look back on these days and remember them with a rose-tinted filter of cute small people and happy family moments. But when you’re in it? Sometimes it’s easy to forget how special these days are. And you know what? I think that’s OK. In fact, I think it’s totally normal.

Making the same breakfast days on end, playing the same games, reading the same books – kids are creatures of habit and often like things the same. And with that sameness comes a comforting and important feeling of stability. But it can also bring a sense of dull. At least, for me anyway.

It’s not all negative though. When I was editing my video I laughed at lots of moments. And then I watched it back and realised that many of those moments WERE filled with happiness, even if I didn’t necessarily realise it at the time.

There’s a strong trend these days for living in the moment, appreciating the little things, turning the ordinary into the extraordinary. But the truth is, life isn’t a film, and it doesn’t make us bad people or bad parents to sometimes forget the importance of appreciating the everyday. It just makes us normal.

So that’s my big confession. Sometimes I find mum life dull. It doesn’t mean I don’t love my kids (I do, more than life itself), it just means I occasionally need a reminder that these years are short and, one day, I’ll miss them.

Can you relate? Do you ever feel like this too?

Here’s my latest Day In The Life video if you’re interested in glimpsing a regular, real family day…

Filed Under: Kids, MOTHERHOOD Tagged With: motherhood, mum life, Parenting, raising kids, real mum life

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Comments

  1. grandma from the north says

    February 25, 2017 at 7:33 pm

    Hi, I never even considered that life could possibly be a film…not sure what genre I would be in…probably silent movies…x

    Reply

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Hello and welcome! I'm Molly Forbes - podcaster, presenter and blogger with a passion for positivity, confidence and body image chat. Regularly writing and vlogging about empowering female issues from a motherhood angle, I also cover lifestyle and fashion topics for like-minded mums who want to rediscover themselves after having children. Thanks for stopping by! Read More…

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Just popping in to bring some sexy realness to you Just popping in to bring some sexy realness to your feed and remind you not to compare your life to an edited highlights reel. Here I am on my swanky holiday in a five star hotel freshly woken after a refreshing eight hours’ sleep in silken sheets wearing my designer nightwear. #LifestyleGoals
It’s important to distinguish between doctors an It’s important to distinguish between doctors and dieticians, and to remember that GPs and doctors are NOT dieticians. People go to university for four years and then often do Masters or PhD’s before they start practising in dietetics. Doctors are great (my sister is one!) but they are not dieticians. Being a doctor does not automatically give you the expertise to give nutrition advice. Remember this if you are referred to Slimming World or Weight Watchers by your GP, or if you watched a certain TV show last night (hosted, btw, by a medical psychiatrist, not a GP - see @drjoshuawolrich post for more on that). 
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I think it’s concerning when doctors write diet books, particularly when they are well known celeb doctors. Not only does it drive a weight-focused health agenda (side note: doctors! Read Health At Every Size by Lindo Bacon PhD!), but it perpetuates anti-fat bias in the medical community. 
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And this matters why? Because weight stigma and health are not compatible. Research shows many of the health outcomes blamed on weight can be attributed to the effect of weight stigma rather than the weight itself, but ALSO weight stigma means many people put off going to see a doctor due to past upsetting experiences in the GP surgery OR they are not properly diagnosed because their weight is the focus of the consultation. 
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Look, I’m not coming for doctors. I appreciate you and know you’ve done an exceptional job in the pandemic. Again, my sister is a doctor. BUT doctors are a product of society just like you and me. They are human with their own internalised biases. It’s important we remember this, particularly if their prescription involves nutrition advice which many dieticians would condemn as being actively bad for health.

#BodyImage
Re-sharing this vid from January to show, despite Re-sharing this vid from January to show, despite what fatphobic attitudes would have you believe, body acceptance does NOT mean “giving up”. It IS possible to enjoy moving your body without weight loss being the ultimate goal. 
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Diet culture has messed up our relationship with exercise just like it’s messed up our relationship with food. And the government’s Better Health campaign just continues to perpetuate the myth that exercise is a weight loss tool, and that those in bigger bodies can’t be fit. WRONG! 
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⚡️Did you know research shows people who are fat and fit live longer than those who are thin and unfit? ⚡️Did you know weight stigma and anti-fat attitudes are a massive barrier for many people who want to work out? ⚡️Did you know that exercising for intrinsic reasons (how it makes you feel) over extrinsic ones (how it makes you look) is a better long term motivator for consistent exercise? ⚡️And did you know that a study in 2007 showed people who are motivated to exercise for health and enjoyment reasons had a lower pulse, systolic blood pressure and salivary stress hormone levels while those motivated by weight loss had none of these physical measures? Fitness through a diet culture lens is NOT the one! 
.
If you want kids to enjoy movement then teaching them that all bodies are good bodies is absolutely KEY to a lifelong healthy relationship with exercise. 
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But also: other people’s bodies and health habits are none of your business! People have the right to respect and dignity REGARDLESS of their health status. 
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And finally (I’ll put my megaphone down in a sec) ALL movement is valid, despite what the “go hard or go home” crew tell you. It’s YOUR body, move it however you want, however it feels good, and not to “atone” for the “syns” you ate at your last meal ❤️❤️❤️
#BodyHappy #BodyImage
CELEBRATE YOUR BODY ❤️ This book by @sonyarene CELEBRATE YOUR BODY ❤️ This book by @sonyareneetaylor is just the most joyful book to help girls understand and embrace their changing bodies. My eldest is 10 and she read it cover to cover, and it’s sparked so many gorgeous, open, curious conversations about puberty and periods and hormones and emotions and all the things. 
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@thebodyisnotanapology
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[ID: Celebrate Your Body book by Sonya Renee Taylor]
Tonight should be our first night on holiday in Sp Tonight should be our first night on holiday in Spain. Made up for it with a meal outside at the village pub and a “late” bedtime (any evening out past 8pm is late for us!). Devon is heaven ❤️ #mumlife
ALL children have the right to feel good about the ALL children have the right to feel good about themselves and their body - not just the ones who “look healthy”. Children are being taught at a younger and younger age that their body is a problem that needs to be fixed. 
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The current climate of intense body shaming disguised as health concern is creating policies which actively damage the relationship children have with their bodies. There is a huge amount of evidence showing that the better kids feel about their body, the more likely they are to make choices that make their body feel good - like taking part in movement or eating in a happy, intuitive way. 
.
Making health all about weight not only damages kids’ body image, making them either feel like their body is “wrong” or fear it becoming “wrong”, it also gives a free pass to the diet industry to aggressively market their products at children, under the guise of health. Ironically, encouraging kids to engage in dieting and habits which are actively bad for their health. This culture affects ALL children.
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And of course this version of health, and this focus on making kids’ bodies the problem, lets the politicians off the hook. Easier to put the nation on a diet instead of investing in policies which will reduce inequality and give everyone access to the things needed to live a full and healthy life.
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There is a silver lining though, because we can choose to be part of the solution. We can say no to diet culture at home and challenge it when it pops up in the spaces kids should be safest.
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If you’re a teacher our Body Happy Kids workshop is an intro to this subject with tools for creating body happy spaces for the children in your care. Find out more and sign up via my bio. ❤️ #BodyHappyKids
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